We’ve already established that I love music. I love music of all types, to be exact, and so it should come as no surprise to you that among some of my favorite little ditties are a few numbers which contain lyrics I wouldn’t recite in front of my parents.
OK, maybe I would, because grown, but that’s beside the point. Here is a list of 10 songs that i absolutely love inspite of the completely inappropriate lyrics:
1. Akinyele “Put It In Your Mouth” – Let’s get right into it with a song about fellatio. And cunnilingus. Right from the beginning we are hit with the ratchet as a young lady sings at the top of her lungs and with much rhythm about the fact that her baby has left her, and so to get over this, she goes to his best friend’s house and asks him to put it in her mouth.
2. Lil Kim – “Not Tonight” – This song is as old as your oldest teenager right now, and I still sing it with gusto whenever it comes up on my playlist. I don’t care. Fight me. Kim came so hard on this song, which goes into great detail about why she doesn’t want the D tonight, but instead would require a good tongue lashing. Act like you don’t agree; this is an all-time ladies anthem.
3. Akinyele – “Fuck Me For Free” – Yes, this is another one from that sage of hip hop past, Akinyele. Clearly tired of having to spend money in order to get the goods, he comes out honestly and asks the young ladies if they wouldn’t mind fornicating under consent of the king for free, because this is how real Gs get down.
4. ScHoolboy Q – “Grooveline pt. 2” – In which our young homey asks over and over again if we ladies would engage in a little track walking for him. My answer? I’m looking for the man who is good enough to make me want to sell that pussy for him. In the meantime, I will continue to enjoy this song and sing the lyrics of the hook at the top of my lungs.
5. Gangsta Boo – “Can I Get Paid?” – aka Stripper’s anthem. You have to imagine yourself working in a strip club, depending on tips to make your livelihood, and here comes some dude with no money in his pockets looking to get a lap dance. Sir, are you serious right now? Get your broke ass out the club if you ain’t gon’ tip. I mean that shit, and I ain’t even a stripper (yet).
6. YG – “I’m a Real 1” – I only came to know this song and the artist through GTA V, but I’m already hooked. This particular song is a personal fave simply because this man admits to being a lick-em-low lover on the first date. I personally don’t go for that kind of dude, because eww, but the line itself is funny, and it is what endeared me to this song. There you have it.
7. 100s – “Life of a Mack” – Another banger from the GTA V soundtrack. The first verse alone makes this song a winner for inappropriate lyrics of the year. People who play GTA Online with me are lucky that I no longer turn the volume up on the television when I’m playing (I can hear voice chat through my headset), because if that were not the case, I would obnoxiously be reciting these lyrics each and every time they came on as we rode along the streets of Los Santos.
8. N.W.A. – “Automobile” – This is an inappropriate lyrics classic! If you can resist Eazy E singing “You don’t have to front on me bitch” in an off-key voice, I’m not even sure why we are associated with each other. Then again, maybe we aren’t. In which case, get into it so we can be friends. I still know every single lyric to this song, and often, in lieu of saying goodbye to my friends, I sing, “Get out, get out, get out,” much in the same way Eazy did at the end of this song.
9. Dr Dre ft. Snoop Dogg, Kurupt and Daz – “Bitches Ain’t Shit” – Another inappropriate lyrics classic. Let’s get into the way the girl at the end is harmonizing about how much she doesn’t give a fuck. You know you sing that part the loudest; don’t front. Not to mention this is classic Snoop, Daz and Kurupt the way we remember them, and that alone puts it in the Inappropriate Lyrics Hall of Fame.
10. N.W.A. – “Just Don’t Bite It” and “She Swallowed It” – There are few guilty pleasures in life more enjoyable than listening to Lorenzo Patterson better known as MC Ren rapping over some of the hardest west coast rap beats in existence as he discusses several women who love performing fellatio. Come to think of it, there’s nothing better than Lorenzo Patterson, but I digress. These songs go into the same listing because they are basically parts 1 and 2 of the same song, and I am all the way here for it, inherent misogyny aside.
Have I missed any? What’s on your list of inappropriate song lyrics? Let me know in the comments.